Home' Trinidad and Tobago Guardian : December 24th 2015 Contents A37
Thursday, December 24, 2015 www.guardian.co.tt Guardian
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• From Page A36
This is a Saturday morning film.
Get out of bed late, take your duvet to the couch
and get lost in black and white celluloid. Grant s
voice will lull you to sleep despite Katherine Hep-
burn s shrieking. He has one of those voices which
could make even a truck driver on amphetamines
fall asleep at the wheel. In spite of the slapstick
humour and the massive leopard (the eponymous
"Baby") it feels like the director was addicted to
5 Harry Potter
These films have no artistic merit and should
never have been made. But they were made, sadly,
and they re interminably dull. You ll fall asleep
involuntarily as a kind of unconscious individual
6 Octopussy (or any Roger Moore era Bond
Great title but a snore of a Bond film in many
ways. It was Moore s penultimate outing and ends
with him dressed-up as a clown at a circus after
a hairy train ride. By that point it s become quite
confused and in all honesty you ll never make it
There s a scene where Bond is served a stuffed
sheep s head and the baddie pops out the sheep s
eyeball and munches on it. It s quite awful but you
won t see it: you ll be asleep.
The film s saving grace is the opening song, All
Time High. I first watched it on a National Express
coach as a child in the mid 80s. I got halfway
through, then dozed off even though I was a Bond
fanatic at the time.
7 Pirates of the Caribbean
I ve never seen this film all the way through, nor
any of the subsequent remakes. After half an hour
something deep inside me shuts down and I literally
don t give a s--t what happens next.
8 Out of Africa
"I had a farm in Africa at the foot of the Ngong
Hills," narrates Meryl Streep at the beginning of
this Oscar-laden film in which she plays a Danish
woman who marries a Danish aristocrat but ends
up banging Robert Redford, as you do.
Those opening lines are so hypnotically recited
you re yawning from the outset. As a child I recorded
the SuperBowl over our family copy of Out Of
Africa when we ran out of blank tapes. When they
discovered what I d done they were understandably
9 Star Wars
Any film shown on Saturday afternoon television
is nap fodder, but Star Wars really takes the biscuit
with its bleeping noises, rubbish set pieces, awful
special effects, cuddly ewoks and impenetrable
plots. I ve never known what s going on and I ve
never cared. The prequels are even more soporific
than the originals. Ja Ja Binks, in particular, sounds
like he just wants to have a spliff and kotch under
a palm tree.
10 Dr Zhivago
If anybody has ever watched this film in its entire-
ty, please write in. You deserve some sort of prize.
A collection of short films perhaps.
Films aid in a good sleep
Two Community Comfort Patrol (CCP) security officers involved in the miracle
birth of baby Christina in the back seat of a patrol van on the Eastern Main
Road, Mount Hope, last Monday, presented mother and daughter with a
SO Sheldon Lawson and SO Seandell Davy presented Cheryl Glen, the baby's
grandmother, with the hamper at the CCP's Office, Port-of-Spain, on
Wednesday morning. In photo, Nigel Thompson, left, SO Lawson, Glen, SO
Davy and Deputy Mayor of Port-of-Spain Keron Valentine with the hamper.
Glen represented 31-year-old Delon Assanah as both mother and daughter
were still warded at Mt Hope Medical Complex.
The security officers were also awarded for going above and beyond the call
of duty and were given a commendation by Valentine as well as tokens of
appreciation from Thompson who represented the Mc Intosh Alumni and the
Thompson Family-Tree Foundation.
FOR MIRACLE BABY
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