Home' Trinidad and Tobago Guardian : September 11th 2016 Contents WEDDINGS
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Sunday Guardian guardian.co.tt September 11, 2016
he bride has chosen you as her best
maid of honour because she trusts you
to help her make her wedding day per-
fect. She believes that of all her friends, you are
the one who will understand just how impor-
tant this is to her. And that's why you have to
put your best foot forward. Here are eight ways
to ensure you do this:
It doesn't matter if you don't like weddings, this is
your friend's dream and she has chosen to share it with
you. So share her excitement and approach the wedding
planning with enthusiasm. Yes, you are going to be dis-
cussing wedding themes, colours, ideas, centerpieces,
caterers and lots more over and over again. Offer your
honest opinion when the bride wants it, and try to un-
derstand why she wants everything to be perfect.
Be her right-hand
No matter how smoothly everything seems to be
going, the bride will probably still be a bunch of nerves
right before she walks down the aisle. Be her right-hand
woman. Help her stay calm by assuring her that you will
be the first point of call if there is an emergency, and
that you will take care of things. If she knows her best
friend has her back, chances are she's going to worry
Because she wants everything to be perfect, the
bride will second-guess herself. So as the maid of hon-
our, it is up to you to help her make important decisions
and stick to them. You need to also be the mid point be-
tween her and the bridesmaids. If the bridesmaids hate
the dresses she's chosen, be diplomatic and gentle, and
let her know early. Do not just tell her they hate the
dress style; instead suggest ways to make it better, for
example, come up with alteration ideas.
Be available for all important appointments. If you
cannot make it, be apologetic and try to let the bride
know as early as possible. Do not give her the impres-
sion that her big day is not important to you.
Throw the Bachelorette Party
One of your most important tasks is organising the
bachelorette party. Ask the bride what she wants and
who she'd like to invite. Use this as a guide to plan the
best party she'll ever have pre-wedding.
Play your Role all day
On the day of the wedding, you are maid of honour
from the moment you wake up to the time you go to
bed. Do not forget or shirk your duties after the cere-
mony is done, continue to help to make sure the recep-
tion goes smoothly and everything winds down as it
should. Make sure guests sign the guest book (if there
is one), and deal with the caterer and entertainment.
Ward off panic
It's common for brides to get jitters and have second
thoughts in the weeks leading up to the wedding. Be
there to help her through the 'have I got the right
dress?' and all similar questions. Reassure her that she
has made the right choices, and if she wants to make
any major change, make sure she's thinking wisely.
Give a 'bess' speech
One of your main roles is delivering a speech at the
wedding. If public speaking is not your strong point,
practice, practice, practice. Even if you are good at
speaking in front of many people, still practice. Do not
wing it, even if you think you can. Jot down key points
on cue cards to refer to during your speech. Be simple
and genuine when you talk about the love the bride and
groom share. Talk about their best qualities, speak from
the heart. Leave out the embarrassing jokes about the
bride or groom, do not share secrets, and do not give
the speech while inebriated.
ltering their surname is one of the most symbolic
actions women agree to when getting married.
Even though the process is somewhat tedious, this
tradition has been one that many, including Maurisa
Williams-Peters happily accepted and one of which she is
excited to share with us.
WB: Before getting married, did you ever think about changing
your last name?
Maurisa Williams-Peters: (Smiling) no I did not! However, as a
young girl I thought about getting married and having a hyphenated
WB: What was the most revealing thing about this process?
MWP: It's very time consuming.
WB: What did it entail?
MWP: Several steps, if I remember correctly. After I got the mar-
riage registration documents, I then had to present copies to my bank
-- to have my name changed (altered) on my account. Then I had to
present copies of the marriage documents and re-apply for a new
identification card, passport, driver's permit, etc. With all that, I still had
to carry a copy of my marriage certificate around with me for a few
months -- just so I could verify the name change when I needed to.
WB: What was the time period; how long did it take?
MWP: It varied depending on the institution. At the bank it was im-
mediately. For my ID card, about six weeks. Driver's permit, immedi-
WB: So what finally made it official?
MWP: I guess you can say the marriage certificate entitles or quali-
fies you to the name change but you could say that the actual ID with
the new name made it official.
WB: After changing your name did you have to go around calling or
visiting people to advise them?
MWP: No -- I just changed my status on Facebook.
To change your name after marriage you need:
The original (and a copy of) your Marriage Certificate or Deed Poll
(official document for name change)
National Identification card, Passport or Driver's Permit
These documents should be then taken to:
Inland Revenue Division
Port of Spain, Trinidad.
Tel. (868) 623-1211-4
Opening hours: 8 am to 4 pm, Monday to Friday, except public holi-
Information courtesy www.finance.gov.tt
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