Home' Trinidad and Tobago Guardian : January 11th 2017 Contents tobagotoday.co.tt January 11 - 2017
My friend and her husband have only
been married for six months and already
he has filed for divorce. I am totally con-
fused and shaken by this news because
to me they represent the ideal. He is tall,
athletic, educated and extremely hand-
some and she is his equal in every regard;
brains, beauty and a bombshell body!
Her husband confided to a mutual friend
that my friend grew up too sheltered and
as a result the spark has gone dim already.
She is an excellent cook and homemaker
but she is shy in the bedroom and wears
long nighties to bed. It is not hard to
fathom that keeping oneself pure until
marriage and not being exposed to par-
tying and liming is now a bad thing but
now that she is married that should have
changed but it hasn't.
I can totally understand that they are
both young and perhaps at this stage he
might crave certain experiences but there
has to be another answer. Since finding
out I have started questioning my own
relationship. I have no self- esteem issues
but I know that I don't measure up to
my friend aesthetically or academically.
If she could be cheated on and subse-
quently left after only six months of mar-
riage then what can I expect?
Maybe I need to lower my expectations
of relationships and marriage or stay away
from marriage completely. I guess the
popular saying is true... good girls really
do finish last. Janelle, what is the secret?
What do men really want? My friend has
it all yet that wasn't enough.Confused.
It would be virtually impossible for me
to tell you what a man wants in a woman
since that explicitly depends on the man,
his culture, his beliefs, his desires and
most importantly what appeals to him.
Some men simply want someone who can
take care of the house while others place
greater importance on a companion who
is intelligent while others prefer a lady
whose physique is outstanding.
You should not however use another
person's experience as the basis for your
relationship goals. Of course it is wise to
learn from the challenges and triumphs
of others but every individual is unique
and as such every relationship would be
unique as well.
I truly sympathise with your friend but
contributing factors such as their ages,
whether they received pre- marital coun-
selling and even whether they got married
for the "right" reasons need to be taken
into consideration. Being "the ideal" on
paper does not automatically mean that
two individuals are compatible and being
on the outside looking in and forming an
opinion is the surest way to be misled.
Be available to your friend so that she
knows that she has a shoulder to cry on
but do not let their misfortune influence
your actions. Talk to your partner about
your desires and fears and seek counsel-
ling for your anxiety if need be.
Let your friend live her life and you
live yours. Focus on building a strong
foundation in your own relationship and
if it is meant to be then everything will
work out just fine. I wish you the best.
Feel free to drop me a line to give an
update on what is happening.
What do men really want?
A joyful hug as this student of the Happy Haven School receives his Christmas gift, provided by
members of staff from Digicel Tobago.
This student of Happy Haven is all smiles as he shares a moment with this Digicel team
Georgina Peterkin (left), shares a moment of laughter with a student of the Happy Haven
Digicel team members Evelyn Carrington (left) and Georgina Peterkin dances with a student
from the school during their Christmas Party.
Students of the Happy Haven
School in Tobago had their share
of Christmas cheer courtesy staff
Members of the Digicel Tobago
office hosted a Christmas party for
the kids complete with gifts and
party bags. The event began with
a prayer session and was followed
by a luncheon for both the students
and teachers of the school. The
excitement continued as the DJ
provided the perfect setting for
dancing and singing as Digicel team
members and students and staff of
the school created lasting memories.
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